with love and squalor

December 23, 2008


But you’d never quite understand how they could first leave you for some reasons (obvious or mysterious), and would later come back to you smelling like No.5.

I suppose while time could wreck havoc to Brigitte Bardot without a hint of mercy it could also do wonders to gifted grapes, you know.

I am by no mean a talented swine but all of a sudden I feel that I can photograph again, and that I can scribble again. I even feel that I can make a strangely beautiful movie somehow.

They all came back, the smugness, the arrogance I possess since little.

Maybe my recent lack of reading has brought down the creative benchmark significantly, thus deluding myself with lowered expectations and mediocrity.

Or perhaps the virtual reappearance and affection of a certain lover from my youth indicates that I am (or was) capable of some beauty, after all.

Or it could be the hallucinating Shanghai haze.

Who the hell knows?

I turned 41 last month and for present I got myself a couple of Moleskine notebooks and a better made Hero Brand fountain pen and I like what I did on the first two pages.

I like them not because they are pretty.

They are not.

They are just yours sincerely.

photograph by ralph gibson


4 Responses to “with love and squalor”

  1. Crankshaft said

    About time.

  2. hakkamui said

    Welcome back Brother!

    I am glad, and believe me, many are!

    Cheers, and a Merry Xmas!

  3. engkaulah said

    The pride of ownership knows no bounds. :)

  4. youtiup said

    at least i call you sometimes.

    i never went away leh.

    got nuttin to with with that, man.

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